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GEEKIN' OUT

Star Wars In Under 60 Seconds

Dr. Faustus, Dr. Seuss's Awesomer, Geekier Brother...Or Something

Behold! Another sweet find of geekily awesome art, this time from Dr. FaustusAU (RJ Ivankovic). You can see his entire collection over on DeviantART. Just hit this jump.







Geekin Out With Kris From Massive Score

You have hopefully noticed (because you visit, often) that we have been featuring videos, art, books, and other items from a lot of artists around the web. Part of being a geek, at least for me, is getting to know other people in the community. I love contacting the artists, writers, and other bloggers we link to or feature. Anyway, in another Geekest first I sat down with Kris from Massive Score and he was awesome enough talk about gaming with me and to give his very first interview. (you can check out Massive Score here) So enjoy...

Note: The first part is just Kris and myself generally discussing games. The last part is about his work at Massive Score and in the gaming world, so if you really wanted to you could just wait for that. But you’d miss the random funnies.


After a tasty dinner at 7, Kris and I went back to his place to get down the real discussion. As we sit down I notice the gamer that Kris really is. Entering his bedroom/office I am greeted by a plethora of posters including Go Home, Dinosaur, GTA, Elder Scrolls, Pokemon, and even a Resident Evil window display. There are various collector’s items scattered all over as well, Halo, Batman, Pokemon, and the like. That would probably be enough to the get the idea that this man likes him some games, but his systems are on display too. A Wii, WiiU, PS2, PS3, Xbox360, a Genesis, Super NES, 3DS XL, and an N64 are all in the open and most are hooked up a 47” Samsung flat screen. To top this off that as soon as we sit down he fires up his gaming rig and starts playing Tera, which he played through out the discussion. This man is obviously about his business, and that business is games. I take a seat behind him as not to distract too much from his gameplay, (I am not a jerk) and we begin. 

 

TheGeekest: Do you consider yourself a geek or a nerd?

Kris: Um, am I supposed to answer now?

TG: Yea, that's how this works.

K: laughs I don’t consider myself either of those things. I just like what I like, and I like some nerdy and geeky things. But…I don’t like putting a label to it. Mainly because those labels are so- the labels are so thin now. Because everybody is a nerd or a geek anyway, so… I don’t now.

TG: OK, you’re saying you have the interests that align right, I mean, they would line up?

K:  Right. Yea.

TG: Which of those interests would you say is the strongest? Which is the one you like to talk about, that you enjoy the most?

K: Video games, definitely video games.

TG: And you have a preferred platform?

K: I definitely prefer PC. I used to be all about the Xbox, but the more I thought about XBL the more I thought about the waste of money that it is. Like, why do I have to pay to use the Internet that I already pay for? That’s the way it seemed. It’s a $60 a year thing to use Netflix, which you already pay for, to use Hulu Plus, which you already pay for, to use Amazon, that you already pay for, to use Crackled, which you can use on your computer for free.

TG: I agree.

K: It’s a waste of money. If you really need to do any of those things …I have a TV, I have a PS3, even my WiiU can show those things, so yea. But now I am all about PC.

TG: So what was the thing that started you? The first game that you knew this is what you wanted to do, “This my thing.” That you couldn’t wait to get home to play.

K: The very first?

TG: The first you were hooked on.

K: Um…Oh gosh. I don’t know about that. When I was a kid it was different. Every time I got a new game I was, “Oh I am going to go home and play this all day!” But-Oh! I think the first game that I was so crazy into-

TG: Oh god, say “Kingdom O’ Magic.

K: laughs No, the game I was constantly, constantly wanted to play, that I was trying to draw even though I can’t draw, and anytime I was playing it, because I wasn’t home I was telling people about it, was Kingdom Hearts.

TG: And what would you say are your top games? Top 5 or 10, they don’t have to be in order. Just throw out a few.

F: Favorite games? Ok.  Well, BioShock Infinite is one of the best games I have ever played. I really, really like the Splinter Cell series. I like HalfLife 2. I know that a really generic PC game to say. I am a sucker for Mario games. I bought the WiiU just so I could play Mario in HD. Yup. Oh, and Zelda. Zelda everything. Majora’s Mask is my favorite Zelda game.

TG: Cool. What is your favorite system? Not maybe to play on now, but ever. For its time.

K: My favorite console ever, or I guess platform, is definitely the Super Nintendo. Because the controller was perfect, it had all the buttons you needed. And even thought the graphics were pixelly, and I know that pixelly graphics are annoying to people now… But that’s because it makes it look blurry, but with the Super Nintendo they did the pixeling on purpose. It wasn’t a side effect of bad anti aliasing or something.

TG: Here is one thing I have noticed and this just my own thing. I get pissed off with people complaining about graphics, because of the games that hooked me. The ones I had to get back to, were Decent-

K: Free on good old games, which is awesome.

TG: And The Legend of Zelda.

K: I never really played the first one. I realized that the first Zelda is the only one I have never beaten before the other day.

TG: A lot of people haven’t. That’s why I restarted it.

K: I downloaded it and started really playing and I realized, “I have never done this before.” Laughs

TG: Yea. I mean, I played it as a kid... But I didn’t beat it beat it. I had pretty a hard time. I think because of the age that gamers our age were at the time, we didn’t understand the whole concept.

K: Yea. When I a kid…I mean, I didn’t even own a NES. We rented a NES and rent a game. And, I rented Mario or a Tiny Toons game or something. Because I was a little kid. I didn’t know what the heck Zelda was. First Zelda I ever played was Link to the Past on the Super Nintendo. And I love it, it was awesome. That game was why I was excited.

TG: Yea. Oh, about graphics. What I was saying was that graphics on those games, which I guess were pretty good for the time, but you could have beat them with hand drawings. So the thing about them was that the stories were so good, better than a lot of games now. Because you couldn’t just count it being beautiful and people forgiving you for having shitty gameplay, weapons, mechanics, or physics. You had to have a story to survive. Everything functioned, because graphics weren’t a focus. You were pretty much playing a text or tabletop and the graphics were just kind of there for interface. Now its all the same bag. You can buy five shooters and the one that is going to win is the pretty one. I mean I want the best looking too, if they are all the same. The problem is that they are not all the same.

K: No, I agree with you.  Here are my pet peeves about current gaming… One, I hate the push on mobile games so much. Mobile and social games. That just annoys the crap out of me, because those games are what introduced the whole idea of microtransactions. Now that is leaking into console and PC games. Like Dead Space 3 has microtransactions. The mictrotransactions were not intrusive, you didn’t need them, there wasn’t anything that you just buy that you couldn’t earn. But, a lot of people were, “Oh well that’s the way to do it.” And the problem is people accepting that is just going to make it come out in more and more games. And the more that it appears the more people are going to accept it. The more people accept it, then the more it is going to get used all the time. That will lead to exclusive stuff that you have to pay money for. Which is fine, but when I pay $60 for a game, I should get the complete game. I shouldn’t have pay extra. I shouldn’t have to buy DLCs, or any extra stuff to get the whole game. I should be getting the entire game when I pay $60.

TG: Yea. Don’t get me wrong. DLC is a wonderful thing. I love that you can expand on a game after you have beaten it, whereas before you have to wait for a squeal to continue the story. I just don’t want to get to a point where that’s how you play the game, no pay as you go gaming. That’s stupid. It might work for casual gamers who only play every often, but as gamers we know that’s a risk we take. We want to play the whole game. I am not looking to pay every time I turn my system on. I get pissed off at updates.

K: Yea.

 TG: So what future part of gaming, not games are you looking forward to? Hardware or genre? What has you excited? I know you mentioned Outlast earlier today, but that’s a game. Because a lot of systems are launching or being presented.

K: It’s funny that you brought up genre. There’s a genre of games, which I think, is relatively new. I wish there were more of them, and that is tower defense games. It isn’t new, but it’s not used much and it’s pretty much-

TG: Space Invaders.

K: laughs No, it’s a lot like RTS. It’s just the way that it is laid out. It plays completely different than a RTS. So, it feels like a new genre to me. Hardwarewise, I am not looking forward to the PlayStation 4 at all.

TG: Why not?

K: Well, because whenever they did the whole presentation I was waiting the entire time for something to make me go “Wow!” and instead I got a very pretty Killzone. That looks like it could easily run on my computer. I got a crap ton of social features, which I will never use, and I got the news that it is not backwards compatible with any other PlayStation. I don’t want that. Now the Durango or the Xbox720 or whatever… All we have are rumors and I don’t like any of the rumors. All the rumors are terrible. Mandatory connect, nope don’t want it. And they are going to have a whole anti-used gaming thing.

TG: Yea, but they said that about the PS4 too.

K: But the leaked documents from Microsoft seem more legitimate to me, because it talks about how the games are going to come with a code. You will have to register it like a PC game. It will have a big hard drive that all games have to be on, you can’t play from a disc. That’s awful. Because then what they will do is either they will discourage renting and barrowing all together or demo codes, where you have to do a certain thing a certain way.

TG: Like a license. The prospect of no pre owned is terrifying. We both have a generous collection of games, easily over 200, and it is scary to think, “How many of those games are used?” We wouldn’t have those, because $60 for every game. That makes no sense to me. The reason for used games is because developers and publishers release a $40 or $60 game and a year later it’s $5 cheaper. I hate game pricing. Especially Xbox, because a game is the same price as Sony, but I don’t get online. If I pay the money I should get the same features or get a discount.

K: What pisses me off even more than game pricing, which makes doesn’t make sense, is- well, take BioShock Infinite. It came out in stores and on PlayStation Network the same day and it was $60 either way. Even though there is no publishing, no case, no disc, cover, no manual.

TG: No transpo.

K: And somehow, it is still $60. It makes none of the sense. Just give me a $5 or $10 discount. On the WiiU, digital games are all cheaper than retail. Because that’s how it should freaking be, but no.

TG: I know Steam has a lot sales and Origins, but don’t see that going industry wide. Some of the better games come from startups and newer developers and they can’t afford to that. They have to make money, I understand that, but if your game is that good then it will sale. If it sales at $60, then it will sale like hot cakes at $40. It’s a dumb system.

K: Yup.

TG: Ok. Well…what about games? I know you were telling me about Outlast. Which you invited in your head first.

K: I am looking forward to GTA V.

TG: You like the GTA?

K: I love GTA!

TG: I did not enjoy the IV.

K: I love GTA IV. I kind of, kind of, like Saint’s Row…The problem is that I wish- Saint’s Row could be great. Except to me it is too immature. I get that that is part of what they are going for, but take away the ability to play in the nude and take away your dildo weapon. That would be enough for me take the game more seriously and I would like it a lot better. It is just that it has too many elements that are too stupid, too immature. Doesn’t make sense?

TG: No. Yea. That’s what killed Duke Nuke’em.

K: Yup! The thing is I remember people talking about Duke Nuke’em and they said, “This is way raunchier and way more over the top than the first one.” No, no, no. There is the problem, the people that played Duke Nuke’em 3D were teenagers at the time. They thought the humor was hilarious. They were “Oh my God, he is making jokes about sex and boobs and dicks and hahaha.” Then, all those gamers grew up and the humor they put in the game didn’t grow up. So, when people play the new one they are like, “This is worse than the last one.” And I go, “Nope! It’s the same.” The people grew up.

TG: You know what I call it? The Adam Sandler Effect. I have heard it called the Jim Carrey Effect. Which is this, that when those things came out, Duke Nuke’em, Adam Sandler, that other guy who I just said his name, but I cant remember and don’t care, the audience was kids. Especially games, Duke bears the brunt of it, there was no generation before where video games were at a level where hardcore gaming was really broadly possible and accepted. And as we age the games don’t, not all of them, I mean I bet if we played Kingdom O’ Magic now it would be stupid. They don’t age well. They are good then, we look at them fondly because we grew up with them. That’s why Earthworm Jim hasn’t been remade, because it was funny then.

K: Yea, Earthworm Jim HD was mostly nostalgia.

TG: Like GoldenEye. I know I will catch shit for this, but GoldenEye the reboot isn’t wrong. It’s bad, but it isn’t wrong. How do I put this? Here, it is GoldenEye. I am sorry, it is. That is what GoldenEye was. The problem is that when GoldenEye came out it was end all, be all of the FPS in the general market. It’s a milestone game. I don’t think anyone is going to argue that. GoldenEye changed some things in gaming in general. When it came out, now almost 20 years down the road…you can’t take an experience and replay it on new system. Because now you have had all your Call of Duties, Medals of Honors, Assassins Creeds, and whatever else you want, Red Dead, anything with a gun in it. Before GoldenEye you pretty much had Contra. You jumped around, you picked up ammo, you killed the boss, you got the girl, you went home. GoldenEye was hey, look at what you can do. Even Doom, another milestone game, if you go back and play it…it is awesome, it’s just not as awesome as it was. Anyway, I am rambling. So…Gameswise, what are you looking forward to?

K: GTA V. The new Splinter Cell looks pretty good. Conviction was fun.

TG: The physics on Conviction were amazing to me.

K: That was Unreal, 90% of games are, but it was …yea.

TG: Are they going to make another Unreal?

K: Yea. They have been demoing it, but I don’t think they have released it for anybody.

TG: That might be why I have not heard so much about it.

K: Trying to think if there is anything I am really looking forward to. Ummm, Battlefield 4 looks really nice. But, as we said earlier graphics aren’t everything. It’s very pretty, but there is more to a game than graphics. I really enjoyed Battlefield 3 single play. People said it was garbage and I was like, “Whaaat?”

TG: I enjoyed the Battlefields when I played them.

K: Alright, here are some things that intrigue me in the gaming industry. I am really looking forward to the Oculus Rift.

TG: That is an acceptable answer.

K: I am really looking forward to that.

TG: That’s like the Virtual Boy if it worked right?

K: laughs it’s the HD Virtual Boy, yea.

TG: You know how bad I want to buy a Virtual Boy?

K: God.

TG: I own a plethora of retro gaming devices.

K: All I have is this the Pikachu N64, Super Nintendo, Xbox, PS3, PS2, WiiU, Wii, oh and I have got a Sega on the floor.

TG: I have Gameboys and Gamegears. I have every Gameboy model, including the Micro.

K: One thing I have realized recording Sega games is that the Genesis is awful. You can mod one to use composite and it looks gorgeous, but that’s really complicated and I don’t want to break my Genesis.

TG: Well, I have the cleaning cartridge if you need one. That’s how into the retro I am.

K: Nice.

TG: Yea. So besides the Oculus awesomeness what else are you looking at?

K: Let me think.  I don’t think there is anything, because no one is really doing anything new. The PS4, the stuff in it is new to people that only play PS3.

TG: Well, I guess that brings us to the battery. I am going to ask you a series of rapid fire questions. Then we will go into the Massive Scores from the YouTubes.

K: Yes.

TG: Best Sequel game?

K: Best Sequel? Majora’s Mask.

TG: Ok. Best graphics in a RPG?

K: Lost Odyssey.

TG: Favorite DS game?

K: Pokemon Black.

TG: Ok…Boxers or briefs?

K: Boxers.

TG: Star Wars or Star Trek?

K: Uhhhhh… laughs don’t make me answer me that. Still laughing

TG: laughing you don’t have to answer that. No one should have to answer that. Yea, you don’t post that on the internet.

K: Laughs No, Star Wars or Star Trek…no

TG: Just as Dangerous, favorite Captain?

K: Aw crap. Captain-

TG: If you say Janeway this doesn’t get posted.

K: Hey now, hey now… I loved Voyager, but I am not going to say Janeway. My favorite Captain is Picard.

TG: Of course it is, because you are a man.

K: laughs Because I am a man.

TG: Favorite Sci-Fi movie, non-Star Wars and non-Star Trek?

K: Wait. What? You know, I am going to pull a technicality on this one and say Back to the Future, because Back to the Future is barely Sci-Fi.

TG: Back to the Future is very Sci-Fi! It’s a time traveling movie! Do you understand the concept of Sci-Fi?

K: Yea, yea, yea.

TG: That genre question earlier may have not have been a good idea.

 

 

Now...Onto Massive Score

 

TG: So, Massive Score.

K: Massive Score.

TG: Massive Score is your YouTube Channel.

K: Massive Score is my YouTube Channel.

TG: And you have a partner in crime.

K: And I have partner in crime. Laughs

TG: Very good. I am using the Jedi Mind Trick right now on Kris.

K: Yea. No, Mickey does the videos with me.

TG: He does. You guys have several games you covered. What games have you covered so far?

K: We have done Silent Hill: Downpour, Lollipop Chainsaw, Friday we just put out the last Far Cry 3 video. Monday, we start Tomb Raider.

TG: The new Tomb Raider.

K: The new Tomb Raider.

TG: I should make you play Underworld.

K: I never played that one.

TG: I would subject no one to that. It is the Superman Returns of video games.

K: Oh wow. I thought Superman- nevermind.

TG: No, no. No Superman games. We can’t discuss that right now. That’s a very deep subject.

K: that’s a very good idea. I like the way you think.

TG: So what was the genesis for Massive Score?

K: Well, honestly it is because I have always wanted to do a Let’s Play Channel, but by myself I wasn’t very…interesting, or informative, or funny. I need to do a two man things so that, you know like…umm

TG: Abbott and Costello?

K: No, on YouTube. There is Game Grumps, Two Best Friends, which is more than two guys, but yea. Now, when I told Mickey about the idea he wasn’t too interested. Then I pointed out that there was this 19 year old kid in England that graduated high school last may, in June started doing Let’s Plays, and now makes over a million dollars a year.

TG: And free games.

K: Free games are good as well. So, I was like, “We should get in on this.” And he said “You mean the answer to all our financial troubles?” and I said “Sure, why not?” So, we started recording. At first what we were going to doing was that everything we recorded would be broken down into 10-minute segments and upload everything. Then when we recorded Lollipop Chainsaw we recorded the entire game and we got 47, 10-minute episodes. Sounds crazy right? And I said, “Man, that’s over a month right there.” So then, I was realized it wasn’t very funny. There no jokes, no nothings, and we need to change what we were doing. So there is this other Let’s Player I watch. His name is Nerd Cubed. And what he does is he will record for hours and hours, and then cut it into a 30 segment of just the funny stuff from the entire time he recorded. So, I decided we should do that, but with the 10 minutes. Splitting the game up, because people don’t want to watch 30 min long videos. So, we started going through the Lollipop Chainsaw stuff. We turned 47, 10-minute videos, into 7 10 minute videos, that were actually funny. Pretty terrible ratio, right? Because if we lost 40 episodes that means we lost 400 minutes.

TG: I will put it out there. The 7 episodes that did come out of it are internet gold. So, you edited the right ones down.

K: Here is the funny thing. I feel like that was our, um, test drive game. Because after we did that, we did Far Cry 3. With it we only did 270 minutes and when we cut it down we got 6 episodes.

TG: So what you are saying is that you are getting funnier.

K: We are getting funnier. Yea. In Tomb Raider we have already done 2 hours of the game. Which has given us 4 episodes.

TG: So you got a lot of funny business.

K: Yea, we are really figuring out how to do what we are doing, I guess.

TG: Now do you prefer to be the player or the coach?

K: Well… We have decided that I am not going to play…ever again.

TG: laughs

K: Laughing Ok ok.

TG: No, Kris you have to tell this.

K: Ok. Two Reasons. One, I am good at games.

TG: You are.

K: Mickey is bad at games.

TG: He is.

K: and whenever I was playing we noticed that Mickey wanted to watch me, so there was barely any talking. Whenever we recorded Far Cry we recorded 4 hours all together, which turned into 6 episodes we had. The 4 hours, the first 2 Mickey played, and then I played 2 hours. We played the 1 hour, and we cut the almost the entire first hour that I played, and then we let Mickey play the last hour again. So, 3 hours, technically, turn into 6 episodes and I was like, “That was bad…” Right then, we decided that I was not going to play anymore. We might play co-op stuff, but for the most part it is going to him playing and me helping him with my knowledge.

TG: This sounds like a really bad idea in my head, but I am going to go ahead and say it. Have you considered letting Mickey play multiplayer online?

K: Oh my gosh… That would actually be pretty good.

TG: I think you would make 10, 10 minutes episodes in about 100 minutes.

K: Maybe.

TG: What is the biggest technical hurdle that you guys have had?

K: Honestly, it is when we are recording our audio and Mickey is incredibly quite.

TG: He is soft spoken.

K: He is not. He always says that whenever I complain about how he is quite. I go, “ You mumble.” And he says “ I don’t’ mumble, I am soft spoken.” No, no, no. He speaks quietly, he mumbles too. If it were just quiet then me editing our audio wouldn’t be such a pain.

TG: So it is all Mickey’s fault.

K: The technical part yea. Also, the quality we get out these microphones that we use is pretty bad. I have to put them through filter and stuff. It makes them sound better, but it doesn’t make them sound great.

TG: That brings me to the next question, what is the exact setup you have?

K: For the videos we do together we have two turtle beach headsets, so we can record our audio separately. That way I can modify each of us, instead of editing one audio source. I got a Hauppauge HD PVR that will record the PS3, the 360, and the WiiU. It is pretty awesome.

TG: What kind of software do you use for the audio and video editing?

K: Audio, I use Adobe Audition. For the video stuff I use Sony Vegas. But, sometime soon I recently got Premier. I want to start using that soon.

TG: So what has been the funnest part of the whole thing?

K: The funnest part is the editing. Because, whenever we recorded Tomb Raider the entire 4 hours we weren’t laughing. Afterwards, Mickey said, “We are probably going to have to scrap this whole thing.” And I said, “Why?” He goes, “ I wasn’t being funny, you weren’t being funny. We aren’t gong to use any of this.” And then we started editing. We were laughing like crazy the whole time. That’s the thing, we had forgotten all the funny stuff that we had said or stuff wasn’t funny until we heard it. So, the editing is the best part, because if we record for 2 hours and then edit for 2 or 3 hours. We have to listen to things over and over again and all that stuff. The whole time we are always just laughing.

TG: What is the best part of the people who watch your videos?

K: We haven’t gotten very many comments, or likes, or subscribes... But, the comments we have gotten, have been like the ones that say, “You guys need more subscribers.” Or “I’m going to tell my friends.” Or “you guys are hilarious.” Stuff like that. It’s very encouraging, with no fans.

TG: No. Anyone who is reading this should be familiar with that. Because all of these bastards that read TheGeekest…Somehow I get thousands of hits a week with 7 subscribers, 18 likes, and actually, well, a fair number of comments. I feel cheated. Also, Russians, Indians, and Chinese seem to really like the blog. Those countries make up like 25% of my base.

K: They are using you to get into the country.

TG: Yes, TheGeekest is an evil front. No. We are against grammar, that’s about the only thing. So, where do you see the next step for Massive Score going?

K: Well, I think what will happen is we will go a month without getting anymore subscribers, and then we will quit, and then we will fizzle away.

TG: Is that what you hope happens?

K: No! Not at all. I am just afraid that is what will happen.

TG: Well, if you didn’t have viewers would you keep doing it? Maybe not recording, but playing games and yelling at each other?

K:  That’s the thing. We have been doing that for that year. We just felt kind of dumb because we have been doing it for year.

TG: You guys will get support. I will even pay for the RedBox for a game. A sponsored edition.

K: $2.

TG: That’s right. See, I am not the cheap bastard you think I am.

K: $2.

TG: I paid for this interview by buying him…Dunch? Linner?

K: That’s probably right.

TG: I don’t know. We are both big men, so when we eat it’s not a prescribed meal of the day like normal folk. The joys of being on the internet, we don’t have to obey social rules.

K. Yup.

TG: Now is the point where you get to tell me something that we don’t know about Massive Score.

K: Here is something. We recorded me playing Trials Evolution, because I am good at it. So we play it…and we got into a really bad argument and we decided to delete and never talk about it.

TG: Wow, ok... Time for Quick Hits. What a Trooper. Ready?  Good. Favorite controller of all time?

K: uh, I don’t know, um. I think the best controller is the Xbox controller.

TG: the Xbox original controller?

K: No, 360. The PlayStation is awful, it’s uncomfortable. I cant’ believe they didn’t change it.

TG: Favorite video game paraphernalia?

K: Oh, that’s actually a really easy answer. The guitar controller for Guitar Hero.

TG: That’s right. That’s actually probably how you know him, if not from Massive Score.

K: Way more people know me as the guy who made custom Guitar Hero songs.

TG: That’s right.

K: I made a lot of custom songs for no reason. Then, I got contacted by a Christian Game Developer and they wanted me to make an entire game. So I made an entire game, and instead of expert difficulty there was Holy difficulty. I did all that, then I made music for the Rock Band Network. I worked for one group and they screwed me. They wouldn’t pay me, they wouldn’t’ talk me.

TG: You want to shout to them?

K: No.

TG: You can call them fuckers. I can put fuckers in caps and link their name to dick pictures.

K: No. It was…I forgot their name, but it was really stupid.

TG: the Stupid Bastards, so if the Stupid Bastards ever try to work with you…

K: No, the thing is they had a big name behind them. Because the guy that founded the bands was from a band that people know. [not saying his name here, because I don’t want to get sued]. He got me on. I author like 7 songs for them, then I said “When is pay going to be?” and they said, “We aren’t going to pay you until the songs make money.” That’s fine, but they had me working 40 hours a week for nothing. So, I decided I wasn’t going to do it anymore. But he was cool. He talked to me afterward.

TG: He was a dick.

K: No he wasn’t.

TG: Did he pay you?

K: No

TG: Then he is a dick.

K: No, because it was the band not him.

TG: But he has money? And he made money from the band and your songs? And he didn’t pay you? He is a dick.

K: Yea…he’s a dick.

TG: Oh, we are still on quick hits! You gave your controller…paraphernalia. So, what was your favorite grab for special edition?

K: Um, I’d say the Skyrim Dragon, Alduin

TG: What’s the next you plan on buying?

K: Probably LEGO City Undercover for the WiiU. Maybe Luigi’s Mansion for my DS.

TG: So, last random ass question…Best cover art?

K: Most games have crappy cover art, I can’t think of anything. Uh, no, I will say- well the big games have horrible cover art. Let me say, actually Skyward Sword.

TG: Any shout outs? Besides Mickey, of course.

K: Kanye West

 THE END

The Perfect Way To Geek Out Your Doghouse

If you haven't realized everyone who has anything to do with TheGeekest is a dog lover. I know you probably love your pet (or cat). My dogs, Foxxy Brown and Cleopatra Jones, eat better than me most days and have more toys than some kids. So anyway, I am trying to pick out decor for Cleo's doghouse, it's like 80 sq ft and needs some geek dog love. That's how I found this sweet 8x10 print.


That is Strelka. Who in 1960 was part of Sputnik 5, the first mission to sucessfully send a living creature into space and return them. Which means there is a 87.6% likelyhood that this dog did more with her live than any of us will. That is worth hanging on your wall.  As with everything this random that I find, it's from Etsy. Get your paws on it here

Video Games If They Were Children's Books

Who Didn't Tell Me About Vader vs. Hitler?

Rent-A-Drone

According to PressTV a Japanese security firm, Secom, is planning to start renting drone craft for private use. Supposedly it will use to catch bad guys and record crimes, and not for spying on hot chicks or part of world domination plan. Which, being that it is Japan, I call bullshit on. The drone that they are going to offer is based off a roughly 3.5lbs, 2ft  model by Ascending Technologies, Germany, and Secom's own in house software. (wait...Japan, Germany, Robot...do not like.) They should be availbe for rent at about $60 a month sometime in mid-2014.


don't mine me, just keep on washing your lady bits and whatnot

Zombie Tarot Cards For The Undead Occultist In Your Life


Because apparently, for some reason, it is Zombie Week here on TheGeekest.. (why is this not a thing?) I figured I would share this clever and beautiful Zombie Tarot set from Quirk Books. (I Google occult a lot) Now normally the stuff that gets posted on here only works if you're a manchild, Scrooge McDuck rich, or live with your parents. But at 17 bone (is that a pun?) it is a really sweet deal for some amazing art and an  interesting conversation piece. Check out the shots below if you want to see just how pretty they look. You can be get yours here.


best card box ever


there's an awesome tattoo in there somewhere


BioShock Infinite: The Movie

SPOILER ALERT: IT'S A GODDAMN CUT OF THE GAME AS A MOVIE. IT IS NOTHING BUT SPOILERS! oh...and it's like 4 hours long.

So You're Rich And Zombies Ate Your Chauffeur. What Do You Drive?

Well, probably whatever the hell will get you away from hordes of skullmunchers. But if you just can't bring yourself to be caught undead in a Cobalt, you're in luck. Because the crew over at Fluid Motor Union has your fat cat ass covered. With this.


just killing undeads, dropping off some dry cleaning, you know...Tuesday


picking up the kids from sword practice, not fencing, motherfornicating swords.

where the skulls meet the road

That peoples of the internet is the Project X BMW X5 E53 aka the zombie wagon of your dreams. It comes more than fully equipped for all your zombie survival needs, there is a full list in the video below. She ain't bad to look at either. Sadly, this, like all their work, is custom and a one of kind.

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